I was visiting with a friend this morning as she held her discontent five month old in her arms. He was so tired and needed to sleep. He wanted to nurse, but then didn’t want to nurse. He wanted to be held facing her then wanted to be held facing out. He wanted to close his eyes but fought to keep them open and stay alert. All the while his mom accomodates trying figure out what he wants.
It reminded me of me with God.
Just like that young mom consoling her restless, weary child asking him, “What do you want?” God asks the same of us, “What do you want?”
And, I will speak for myself and not you, I respond, “I don’t know….but give it to me!”
I see myself in this baby’s restlessness, his indecisiveness. He needs sleep but he fights against what he needs – wrestling for what he thinks he wants.
Do you see this struggle in your own life? Can you relate?
God knows what I need, He knows best, yet I war against Him fighting for what it is I think I want. Such a tug of war, this flesh battle for independence and movement. Tossing and turning in His arms. Eyelids pushing back the exhaustion. Restlessness owning my heart.
The madness of me!
Imagine Him moving and swaying there in His arms. The gentle rock of a patient, loving Father consoling the edgy tension rising within. He changes His postion as He hums, His deep voice resonating into your being sending waves of comfort that calm your soul. “What do you want little one, what do you want?” He desires to give you all that you want, but wisdom tames impulse and He holds tighter to settle the stirring within you.
He is all that you need? He is all you need. He is all that you need!