"Don't study this moment. Be in it." 

This is a quote that I not only underlined but dog-eared the page in Brene Brown’s newest book, Braving the Wilderness. It hit me and kept me pondering for several pages after reading it.

We are not traditionally good at this.

We like to circle high above, safely removed, untouched and untouchable.
How much of our lives do we miss because we are circling above instead of being smack dab in the center of it all??
Safely snuggled in between the stories of our lives instead of actively writing the stories ourselves.
We study the moment, emotionally removed in an effort to preserve what we think is important about our versions of the stories being written.

Being involved may mean we

lose our control,

lose our edge.

lose our objectivity,

lose our pulse on the matter,

because the truth is, when the heart gets involved, it gets messy!

"BE IN IT"

Do you dare?

It is a very brave thing to step into your own life and feel every part of it!

To stay close when things get tough, to move in when things get heated, to sit still when things feel crushing, to dance when it feels embarrassing, to speak up when it feels risky, to ask for help when you feel small and insignificant, to see when others turn a blind eye, to remain when all others walk away, to feel all of it, in every moment no matter how small or big, no matter how consuming or diminishing, no matter how crippling or life-giving — no matter!

All of life…all of it!

The births and the deaths,

the important and the insignificant,

the serious and the silly,

the purposeful and the trivial,

the heartfelt and the heartbreaking,

the memorable and the forgettable,

the big picture and the intimate details,

the joy and the sadness,
all of it!

The truth is the sweetest of moments are not as sweet without the bitter parts of this life. The bitter is what makes the sweet sweeter. It is what makes us savor the sweet moments because if we are living IN our lives and not OUTSIDE of them we know that bitter moments are coming and they will take our breaths away wishing for sweeter breaths.

No one said this life would be easy, but they do say it is worth it!

I have lived most of my life from the outside looking in, staying a safe distance, hiding my true self because I thought I was guarding my heart but it was a lie. I have walked around soul dead for so long – the tip of my tongue tasting the sweet and bitter but not taking it all in and holding it in my mouth to experience the depth of it all. No MORE!!

 

I CHOOSE TO LIVE WITHIN

It’s scary but it’s so, so worth it!  Because at the end of it all –

the story is so much better written in your own handwriting instead of just a good read!

I woke up this morning with the word “Transition” on my mind.

Transition is defined by Merriam-Webster aspassage from one state, stage, subject, or place to another changea movement, development, or evolution from one form, stage, or style to another.” 

 

 

What came to mind for me as I thought of the word was the Transition that occurs during childbirth.  Transition “is literally the transition between the first and second stages of labour. Active labour contractions have been dilating the cervix and it’s open and ready for the second stage, when a series of involuntary contractions push baby through the vagina to be born. Transition is often described as the challenging and hardest part of labour. It’s also the shortest and signals to you and your birth team that your baby will be born soon.” https://www.bellybelly.com.au/birth/what-is-transition-in-labour/

 

The challenging
and
hardest
part…
also the shortest!

 

This is important to remember! These thoughts GO TOGETHER!! 
Most challenging AND shortest! 

 

At Sozo Gym when I was working out there and we had a difficult WOD to do – i would always remind myself during the workout, “I can do anything for 1 minute,” or whatever the time frame might be, 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 30 minutes! Because it is true…we can do anything we set our minds to, for however long it takes to get through it, if we choose!

 

 

During transition “many women will doubt their ability to go on at this stage, requesting medication or worrying about how much longer it will take. It’s during this stage of labour women tend to become very vulnerable to suggestions and are more likely to accept interventions they previously didn’t want.” https://www.bellybelly.com.au/birth/what-is-transition-in-labour/

 

We compromise!
When things get tough,
when we are tired,
when the road seems long and painful…
we compromise!

 

We ALL do it…this is not the space or time to beat yourself up for it, to categorize yourself alone in a corner because you are the suckiest, to slip into that victim mentality of the being the worst…we all do it – we all compromise! The Bible reminds us in Romans 3:23 “..all have sinned and fall short..”

 

We all fall short!
When things get hard
When things are painful
When we can’t see the end in sight
When the road seems long
When we feel like all we do is go uphill
When all seems lost
We compromise!

 

But know this sweet friend – relief is coming!
The Most Challenging AND The Shortest!

 

My last three children were home births and I remember the pain of transition very clearly – it makes the hair on my arms stand up! Literally, when I think about the pain of those moments my body can still remember and feel the intensity of those minutes that felt like forever. I can remember my precious midwife telling me a little secret before I went into labor with my first home birthed baby. She said, “Every woman in transition at some point or another says, ‘Anne, I can’t do this, it’s too much, I am at my limit, I am done!’ and that’s when I know that baby is right there!” The most challenging and shortest! 

 

Transition is a time of upheaval and big changes. Up to this point, a woman’s body has been flooded with oxytocin and endorphins, likely making her quite sleepy and relaxed… At transition, the mother’s body releases a flood of adrenaline, waking her up so she is alert and lucid. Adrenaline occurs at the most intense point of labour, which is why transition is often a crisis point for most labouring women…. A very common emotional sign of transition is the ‘I’m done/I can’t’ stage. You may suddenly wake up out of the endorphin soaked haze you’ve been in for some time, and just decide you can’t have this baby today. Or you need drugs right now. You might be incredibly irritated by everything and everyone around you. Some women become incredibly focused and almost withdraw into themselves. They may find it difficult to communicate although they will say later they could hear and understand what was being said, they just couldn’t respond. Restlessness is another common emotional sign of transition. Not knowing to put yourself, wanting to be touched then hating it, wanting company then telling everyone to leave.” https://www.bellybelly.com.au/birth/what-is-transition-in-labour/

 

God knew!! He knew we couldn’t endure the intensity of transition too long – it’s too much, we are too frail, we are weak, our coping mechanisms fail us and we cave in the pressure.
The key to Transition is SURRENDER.
I can remember Anne saying in those desperate moments of exhaustion and feeling so done I just couldn’t go on anymore, I hear her sweet voice whisper in the hushed hours before the dawn, “Melissa, welcome your baby, surrender and welcome your baby!”

 

Our natural instinct is to fight.
We pull back,
withdraw.
tighten up,
hunker down.
It goes against all natural instincts to let go, open up, and surrender.

It is one the hardest things you will ever do but it makes Transition easier – not EASY – just easier.

All of life is Transition!
We are Transitioning in one way or another all of life!
And we can make our Transitioning easier and less painful by surrendering to the process of Transition because whether you want to birth that baby today or not…it’s coming, there is no stopping it! 

 

God’s beautiful work in each of us is a new birthing every time!
Body
Soul
Spirit
He is birthing new things in us.

 

How else can we become more like Christ? We must let the old die, shed dead cells for the new skin to be seen.
Steffany Gretzinger speaks about this as “The Undoing.”
All of life is the Undoing – we are in the process of undoing.
Undoing all the stuff that has been placed on us –
the stuff from our ancestors as we break long-standing generational curses,
the garbage from our parents that they didn’t mean to give us but did anyway because they were broken too,
the wounds from best friends and boyfriends deposited into our hungry souls that left us “less than” we were before them,
the untrue beliefs we hold about ourselves,
the dysfunctional ways we have learned to cope,
the stories that hold us hostage to yesterday,
undoing all that has been so that we can TRANSITION and ready for new birth!

 

 

Transition is hard, it is! The most challenging time for sure, but remember this – it can also be the shortest! Surrender is key! If you fight it– it will last longer…it will be more painful…but it will NOT keep that baby from coming…the baby is coming regardless of how you embrace the process, that baby is coming! So let it come…Welcome your “new baby”, let it come, surrender to the Transition.

treasure map

I was challenged yesterday by a couple in our office. I couldn’t hold back the tears as I listened to their story. It’s a tragic story of loss and rejection but they are overcomers. The issues with their children is what drove them into our office, they were desperate for change which makes a soul hungry and willing.

One of the things we teach, when the door opens, is what we call Recall Healing. This is the belief that the stories, aka unresolved conflicts, of our past have an impact on our children and play out in a physical, emotional and/or spiritual way in their lives. This impact begins even before conception. There is a 30-month window of time known as the programmed or project purpose that includes the 9 months before pregnancy, the conception story, the 9 months of pregnancy, the birth story and the first year of life of the child. The school of thought in Recall Healing is the environment between the parents in which the child is conceived and “brews” in, if you will, is part of that child’s story.

We know that in utero a baby is affected by the physical, emotional, and spiritual life of the mother. That baby is in her and part of her. Every cell that has created the baby contains the combined DNA of the mother and father. We also know, because scientist are awesome and keep studying to learn and understand our world, our bodies, etc that in that DNA parents don’t just pass on the physical traits that make us up like hair color, foot size, and blood type, but they also pass on memories, or stories,  and “programs” that turn genes on and off. This field of study is known as epigenetics. Fascinating! So we are not only a mix of our parents protein DNA but also a mix of stories from our ancestors in our family trees.

In the field of Recall Healing it is believed that children are programmed with certain issues in utero that we can see carried out as patterns/behaviors in their lives. Weird stuff I know, but over and over again in our office we see the raw results of this phenomenon. It is said that a child is either the solution to a conflict a parent has yet to resolve or the child carries the same conflict repeating the pattern of the parent. So for example, a father who didn’t have a voice in his family, who was rejected and not able to speak up may have a son who is very opinionated and feels the pressure to voice his opinion all the time – he is the solution to dad’s conflict. A mother who was criticized for her body type, demeaned, food was restricted, comments were made in earshot may have grown up with a low self esteem. She might have a daughter who emulates that same conflict and turn to anorexia or bulimia as a solution to manage the unresolved conflict that isn’t even hers to begin with.

DISCLAIMER:

Recall Healing is not about blaming,

that is never the path to healing, that is not God’s way –

we don’t search for the stories in an effort to blame,

we search to understand and to free.

The truth is our parents did the best they could, we have done the best we could, even if our best, their best sucked! We can only give what we got. If we grew up with an abusive, critical parent know that they grew up with an abusive, critical parent. Sin begets sin! The purpose of unearthing the painful stories from our past is not to blame, but to own! To own what it is that we got. We can not change what we deny and choose not to see! Only when we are honest with ourselves can change come. To hold the painful stories gives God access to heal our hearts and break the chains that perpetuate the stories!

To be honest, it is a treasure hunt.

Those painful stories written into your soul and the souls of your children can be healed and released from you,

you have the power to change the story and write it anew,

you have the power to change the cells in your family tree even still today no matter the age of your children.

That is treasure isn’t it!?!?!!

So back to that beautiful couple – they came in ready to look at their stories, the stories of their parents and change. They did the hard work of remembering! Choosing to go back to the beginning of their relationship and feel the hard parts, the disappointments, the failures, the loss…it is painful to remember – this work is not for the faint at heart! But the treasure, oh the treasure!

The beautiful part of Recall Healing is that to simply remember, recall a story and share that story with another from an emotional place is what releases the hold that story has on our souls, on our cells. When someone recalls the story and feels the energy/emotion trapped within, releasing that energy/emotion, the cells of the body are freed from that story, no longer there to be passed on. So what does that mean for our children? It means they are released, unhooked from that story. Healthy momma/daddy healthy baby…child…teenager…adult child! God’s gift of healing is not limited to infancy, He can restore the years the locust have stolen at any age!

This beautiful couple has spent the last three weeks remembering, sharing, feeling, grieving their stories and they are literally seeing their children change before their eyes! The mom told me that somewhere along life’s path the free spirited little girl of her firstborn got lost and this past week she literally watched as she reemerged in her daughter’s face right before her eyes. These parents are healing their family tree, breaking off the curses from the 3rd and 4th generations and creating blessings in the cells of their children to extend to the 1000th generations!

Praise Him!

He makes all things new!

Even our cells down to the microscopic level!

I was teary most of the session! What a gift to witness, to have a front row seat to the healing power of God and the willingness, at all costs, of two people to change the course of history for their family forever!

The treasure hunt is never easy! It is dangerous, perilous, treacherous.

Dark, dirty places.

Deep, dingy secrets.

Never easy to find, it takes work, digging, digging, digging!

Your back will ache, shoulders will burn, face will be covered in filth as you unearth.

But when your shovel hits that hard patch buried below, oh what joy!

A treasure chest full of riches, enough to share to the 1000th generations!

buried treasure

Join us monthly for Recall Healing meetings

the first Monday of the month

6:30pm-8pm

at our office located at 101 Teurlings Dr., Lafayette, LA 70501.

Come and hunt treasure with us!